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Dear Ghoulfriend,
So, you can, like, detach pieces of zombies from, you know, the rest of that zombie, right? So, if I had a zombie thingie to carry around would it still work?
-Adam
Dear Adam,
I suspect you've seen "Bride of Re-Animator" one too many times. Zombie parts are not sentient, living things on their own. We are not magical beings; we are merely made of parts, just like you, and those parts require a brain in order to function as intended. While that particular part does seem to have its own brain while attached to a mortal man, this is not the case in men of the living dead. Most male zombies just break them off and throw them away, or feed them to the homeless. Some choose to donate them to our jerky factory, where they are pressed, dried, packaged and sold to convenience stores across the country. It's our most successful business and our jerky is always in high demand, particularly in truck stops. I am told it's chewy and has a delightfully smoky flavor. Pick up a package today!
Love,
Ghoulfriend
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