Ghoulnextdoor.com
The Ghoulish Guidance Archive
Dear Ghoulfriend,
My problem is simple. About two years ago I was at a friend's house late in October, watching horror movies. To make a long story short, when a certain movie came on, a dumb song got stuck in my head. So now every time it gets quiet I find myself singing this song:
"Six more days till Halloween...
Halloween...
Halloween...
Six more days till Halloween ....
Silver Shamrock....."
I understand that I probably do this because I miss my friend and really do not get to see her or talk to her as much as I'd like these days.
I just want the madness to stop and would like an answer that does not involve using a drill to get the song out of my head.
-C. Cochran
Dear Mr. Cochran,
Let me understand this: your brain incessantly re-plays an insipid jingle that you clearly despise, and you view this as a manifestation of your love for your friend. Would that be an accurate summation of your letter?
It pains me to say it, but power tools are not the answer to every problem (though they can be therapeutic in most situations).
This woman is obviously a powerful witch and she has used this mesmerizing song to her own advantage. Without either your knowledge or consent, she gave you a post-hypnotic suggestion while you were transfixed by the strains of that tune, and she now exerts control over every aspect of your life. This annoying song is the trigger by which she persuades you to do her bidding. Unless you can convince her to remove the spell, you will be forced to endure this torment for the rest of your life. Only permanent death will cure your condition.
Your dilemma reminds me of a former colleague who had a relationship with a human female. He was a rather prominent League member, and as such, he intellectually understood the dangers of falling in love with a living, mortal human (these things never work out). However, love is blind, and he chose to try and make a go of it. He courted her for several months (on his best behavior, of course) and finally "popped the question." She knew what he was, and despite her parents' and friends' vehement opposition to the union, she accepted. They eloped to Martinique where, on the wedding night, he was so consumed by his passion for her that he completely devoured her. He tried to stop himself, but he didn't leave enough of her to successfully reanimate, and she was lost to him forever. As you can imagine, he was completely distraught and consumed by guilt. In a vain attempt to forget his faux-pas, he took to watching movies all night and sleeping all day. One night, he watched the movie you mentioned, and because he was physically weak and emotionally vulnerable, his mind was open to all sorts of evil external stimuli. That song became lodged in his brain. From that night on, he sang it all the time and was eventually shunned by everyone in The League. He finally threw himself off a cliff and his brain was destroyed as a result of massive head-trauma.
He is happier now.
Love,
Ghoulfriend
More Living Dead Entities And The People Who Love Them
Return to the Table of Contents
