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Dear Ghoulfriend,
My husband has a "Lord of the Rings" calendar on our bedroom wall and every month we flip it to the new month with a new picture from the movie. Well this month the picture is of Legolas and ever since he has been showing, my 3 month old daughter stares at him smiling and laughing hysterically. She babbles to it, too. She must be possessed (hahaha). Help.......
Signed,
-Can't wait to flip the calendar
Dear Can't wait,
Your daughter is indeed possessed...by exquisite taste. I do worry, though, that she may be disappointed as she grows up to discover that most human men are not at all like Legolas. Or Aragorn, for that matter. She will probably gravitate toward gay bars in order to glimpse heavenly, androgynous creatures resembling her beloved Legolas. This, too, will lead to disappointment. If I were you, I'd abandon the idea of flipping the calendar and leave the month on a picture that features Gollum or Grima Wormtongue, so that she will know precisely what to expect from most males as she gets older. It's always best to be prepared, don't you think?
Love,
Ghoulfriend
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