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Higher Learning
Dear Ghoulfriend,
I have a Master's degree from Pitt, but I was wondering how I could get accepted into S.U.C.S.? Will they accept my Master's and let me start on my Ph.D.? What Doctoral plans do they offer?
-E. W.
Dear E. W.,
S.U.C.S. will normally accept Master's degrees from almost any accredited university in the world, but because you attended Pitt, you may need some remedial classes in order to catch up. Ph.D. programs are available in these exciting fields:
- Professional Trick-or-Treater
- Zamboni® Operator
- Morgue Attendant
- Speed Bump
- Mayor of The City of the Living Dead
- Convention Promoter
- Pine Barrens Dweller
- Public School District Superintendent
- Boat Anchor
- Mall Security Guard
- Fertilizer
- Celebrity Stalker
- Advice Columnist
- ...and many more!
Please send us your transcripts along with a persuasive essay and a non-refundable application fee of $1000.00.
Love,
Ghoulfriend
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